Sometimes Ponies are Jerks

Seriously. Not my two ponies, because I give them Sleezies and Jolly-Balls and Show-Sheen and they love me. But other jerk ponies. Namely the silly mare I ride during my jumping lessons. She gets points for being a bay thoroughbred (my favorite!), but loses points for making evil snake faces when she gets brushed. Today, Snake-Face decided to throw a hissy fit as a cantered her over two trot polls. As we were going over the second, I released her head with my hands, and before I could even half-halt she exploded into a gallop. I wasn't really scared, because I've been run away with before. Out of control galloping doesn't scare me too much. I was just surprised, because earlier in my lesson the horse was being sluggish, lazy, and completely dead to my leg, and we'd done the gymnastics course a few times before with no huge issues.

So I was furiously trying to check her up, while my trainer was yelling "PULL BACK! PULL BACK!" when she started bucking. I lasted about .5 bucks until I went flying off. If there's one thing I consistently think as I fall, it's "KICK YOUR FEET OUT OF THE STIRRUPS NOW!" Every time I fall it's the one thought that blares through my head. I remember thinking it, and trying frantically to make sure my left foot came out as I rotated around, cause my toe was still in. Fortunately, my foot did not get caught. I would've been pissed if it had, because my knee is finally better from the last time I got caught in the stirrups (thanks to another cranky-pant thoroughbred mare). I fell off to the left, and rotated completely around, so I landed flat on my back.

I hit hard. Because I have a ghetto booty, my ass broke my fall. Holy crap, it hurt so bad! My tailbone felt like it was on fire. This is gross, but I was afraid for a little while that blood was going to start leaking out of my butt. That painful. It was the first fall where I couldn't immediately spring up after hitting the dirt. Usually I just pop up and grab my horse. I couldn't even sit up for a few seconds. I laughed at the absurdity of falling off, smack dab in front of my trainer (we were like 10 feet away from her) and another boarder, and having my first real fall in almost two years. My last "fall" was July, off of Andy, and I landed on my feet, so it was really more of an unscheduled dismount. The time before that was January of 2009, when Love Bug tripped at the canter and I fell over her shoulder, in an epic-ly lame fall. I just couldn't believe that that had happened, and that Andy wasn't the cause of it!

So I felt things out, and determined that I wasn't too badly hurt, and finally sat up and assured my trainer that I was ok (I had to tell her several times, as she didn't believe me, heck I didn't even believe me at first). After a minute or two I could get it. My tailbone hurt like a mother, and I was completely shook up. Of course, I HAD to get back on. I was sufficiently freaked out that I really needed to get back of Callie, the mare, and canter her again over poles, or I might never be able to do it again without having serious fear issues. And I think I was so pumped full of adrenaline from the fall that I wasn't in too much pain. So I got back on, and she was still being a jacked-up butt head but I got her to listen to me, got her brakes working again, then cantered successfully over some more poles. Score 1 me.

Of course, then I went home and the pain started kicking in. My tailbone was radiated pain, and my back was starting to stiffen up and become unbearably painful, so I went to the doctor, got some X-rays (I didn't fracture my tailbone! yay!), some vicodin, and some muscle relaxers. Thank goodness, because I can't really walk (I do this awkward shuffling crab walk), or sit, or do anything except lie down. But the drugs make me at least comfortable, which is good, because ibuprofen does nothing.

Sadly, I can't ride for a while. According to my doctor, I need to take a "long time" off and take recovery slowly. heheh, to me, a long time is a week. I honestly have no idea how long it will take to feel better, or how long it will take for my tailbone to be okay. I've bruised it before, and it took about two months to get completely better. And it hurt a lot when I was riding after I feel. Right now there is no way I can sit a canter on it. So I'm taking things slow. My goal is to be able to ride on my lesson a week from today. Suck. I hate not being able to ride. I probably need to be able to walk before I can ride.

In conclusion, some horses are assholes. Fortunately, I have nerves of steel and have dealt with a lot of jerk ponies. My trainer actually told me she was surprised I stayed on for as long as I did, and I did it because I had my heels down. Go me! I am going to go to the barn to see Andy and LB soon, and give them a hug and a kiss, because they are nice ponies who don't buck me off. Although I did forgive Callie, because she's a TB, and I like crazy TBs.